Archive for April, 2009

We have taken on a roll that many adults now hold, and that is grandparents who become parents to their grandchildren, as well as taking care of their own parent.  It is one thing to raise a child from birth, or a young age, and it is another thing to take on a teenager.  I mean, come on guys, the world is WAY different now than it was when I was a teen. 


The deal with these guys is their previous upbringing, or lack thereof.  There was a big focus on being obedient and saying “Yes, Sir” and “No, Ma’am.”   While, we feel it is more important to have respect and give respect than it is to say meaningless words that you are beat for, if you do not say them. 


The boys did have varying degrees of influence from us.  They were with us, for their first: nine years, six years, and three years respectively.  The youngest does not remember living with us at all.  The oldest made a fluid transition to our home.  He did not make a fluid transition to school.  He once did a whole semester of homework, without ever turning it in to the teacher.  This is something only a homeschooled boy would do; or an idiot.  And, he is not an idiot.  We found out about it because we had four teachers tell us, at his first public school conference, that he was a genius.  I could only look down at the F’s across the page and ask “Why this, then?”  Not turning in homework will make even a genius fail. 


What worries me is the lack of “love of knowledge and education.”   It was more important in their stepfather’s home, to fear than to love.  Fear Stepfather’s belt and retribution, fear (for girls) of not wearing prairie dresses and head coverings.  Fear of the word “Foolishness.”  That last one is because it means the “rod of correction” is going to beat it out of you when your grandparent’s leave. 


These three are safe now and have varying degrees of success.  They do not know how to judge people, as their past experiences consisted only in friends like themselves.  Which consisted of other ultra conservative Christian home schooled children who are protected from the world out there by paranoid parents.  So, we are now locking our doors and covering our windows so the Bi-Polar ex-girlfriend of EMT will leave us alone, perhaps proving that it is not so bad to be paranoid.  But, it is not a good way to live.  He trusts everyone and is friends to everyone, even someone who is in need of commitment (even her mother says so at this point). 


I do not understand why these parents, who isolate their children from modern society, do not realize that their children must go out and live in the world we all live in and if you do not provide a child with the tools to recognize and understand that world, that they will have a hard time getting along in it.

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Guilty Pleasures on Allison’s Blog. Guilty Pleasures « That’s What She Blogged


Here’s a quick list of mine :


1.     Yes, People magazine.  You don’t look so guilty reading it in the doctor’s office though, you know.

2.     My third watching of Tortilla Soup this month.

3.     South Bend Chocolate Company, Dark Chocolate

4.     Watching CBS Sunday Morning in my pajamas.

5.     Taking down my Harry Potter gift trunk to be a kid again.

6.     Having the house all to myself

7.     Singing to myself when I have the house all to myself

8.     Practicing the violin

9.     A mechanical pencil and a sketch book

10.          Reading a good book   


Okay, they are mostly not such “guilty pleasures.”  But, they sure are pleasures.

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XUP Bedtime Stories for the Stout-Hearted « XUP tells the best stories.  I have heard of Rasputin before but this is a great retelling. 

What this has to do with today’s post, you ask?  I am not sure, but I will try to find a way to bring it in.  I just read XUP’s post and had to pass it on.

I am sitting here thinking about fish and guests.  You know that saying about a fish and guests after three days.  I have a guest who is going on fifteen days now.   Today, I sit and think of ways to get her to leave.  Perhaps just, “EMT said you were leaving today, don’t forget the children’s toys.”

Yes, she has children, at her mother’s home and she has gone there and gotten all  three of them once, so I had a Saturday of children and then one of them once, so I babysat for that one.  I’m thinking she is just too comfortable here and it’s time to stop feeding her.

EMT has stated that she is not the person he thought she was.  I pointed out that living with someone can sometimes show that up, and that no one said she would be living here.  He had said, and I quote, “you’ll be seeing a lot of X .”  And that is not X as in XUP.  Her I could put up with for fourteen days.  She, I told you I could find a way. 

Anyway, this girl has got to go.  Fifteen straight days is WAY MORE than a lot of someone.  And, with her, I think three days might be more than enough.

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Until I heard a woman being interviewed a week ago, in reference to the North Dakota flooding, stating that she was lightly optimistic, and that to a Norwegian is like being ecstatic, I had no idea what my Norwegian heritage meant.  You see, I’m a mutt and until just about two years ago, none of those nationalities were Norwegian. 


Mom’s heritage is British and Basque, with a rumor of Native American thrown in there.  My dad, a VanVleck, had always thought he was British on his mother’s side and Dutch on his dad’s side. 


My nephew is really into genealogy JayJay’s World and has traced dad’s family back as far as:  Generation 7:  Van Vleck, John Henry Sr. 


John Henry, Sr., or his family, came to the USA in the early 1800’s.  It is unclear whether he was actually born here or in Holland.  So, dad was partly right, but apparently what my nephew is finding, is that the VanVlecks might have changed their name from VanVlackern when they originally came from Norway. 


I sometimes envy a person with one national heritage.  They know their holidays and their place in the world.  However, us Mutts do have the benefit of getting to choose one or all of the nationalities running in our veins. 


Let’s face it, most of us are from somewhere else,  But, as for me, the Norwegian information does explain some things about my dad.  His lightly pessimistic was like the pits of despondency.

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I really think we all need to laugh more and I have been much too serious lately.  I also watch too much tv but, other than Law & Order and it’s spin offs, most of it makes me laugh.  I look forward to Two and a Half Men and The Big Bang Theory, and I love reading the DiscWorld series by Terry Pratchett. 


I have had an awful time making up names in my writing, and he just puts together a few words and has a city named “Dijabringabeeralong” and has a great visual.  I think the British do have a unique humor and way of viewing the world.


The BBC had a great run of comedies with:  As Time Goes By, To the Manor Born,  Fawlty Towers,  Keeping up Appearances,  Jeeves & Wooster,  Black Adder, and Coupling.  I am sure I have missed a few.


I loved Vicar of Dibley.  Master’s daughter bought husband the complete episodes of The Vicar of Dibley.  I am ready to watch them again.  I really enjoyed Hamish Macbeth too.


When your house is full of little kids, I think you laugh more.  They are just so funny.  EMT’s girlfriend has three little boys who we have enjoyed having over to the house.  Just watch a grandma hold her new grandchild and you will see the best smile in the world. 

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