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Posts Tagged ‘humor’

I would love to have natural humor in my writing.

My humor is of the more dry kind.  Someone is having a conversation and I pop in with a blatently obvious observation that no one else will dare to say.

Okay, example:  I graduated from the School of the (Museum) of the Art Institute of Chicago.  You study all forms of art, 2-D, 3-D, 4-D, etc.  We had attended a show of some performance art, where a young man is naked in a cage and trying to pleasure himself.  (It is the Art Institute); lots of naked, lots of angst.  The class was discussing the ‘purpose’ of the performance and what we learned from it.  I, one of the older students, opens my mouth and out pops, “That it’s harder to come in public than you think.”

To me, it was just one of those rules of nature that everyone should know, but the class spent the next five minutes ROFLOL.  (See, I’m not as old as you think.)

Often, when I say these things, I don’t even realize it’s going to be funny.  This makes it hard for me to write humor.  I’ve had a lot of ‘things’ going on in the last year; ill health of family members, ill health of pets, the financial situation, idiots, etc.  Not a lot seems funny to me and I have made a point of going back through my book and MAKING some funny.

I used to read my daughter’s blog, BRAINDEBRIS  at http://braindebris.wordpress.com/, for lessons in funny.  AND, AND, that girl has started blogging again.  That girl is funny in her sleep and it is just all so natural.  I also have a niece who has you in stitches all the time.  I have just discovered, from one of my other favorite blogs, EpBOT at http://www.epbot.com/, to the Bloggess’ blog:  http://thebloggess.com/2011/06/and-thats-why-you-should-learn-to-pick-your-battles/  This one goes to the top of my list, right alongside http://www.crazyauntpurl.com/  BECAUSE, everyone should have a 5 foot tall metal chicken.

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Remember the Dick VanDyke show?  There was a great episode where he went to his son’s school, probably a “What does father do?” day. He was bombing.  Telling kids you write for a sit-com that is on later than they are allowed to stay up, did not impress them.  Then, he slipped and fell, and they laughed.  So, he started a monologue about what humor is.  It boiled down to one word:  the unexpected.  Okay, that’s two words but the first one doesn’t count.

 

My humor has been on hiatus lately.  I have exactly twenty-seven blog entries started.  I go through them every day; and edit and try to make them either more interesting or funnier.  But, lately I’m just on a dry spell.

 

I should be happy.  I think the world is going well and that leaves me without funny things to complain about.  Maybe, the starving artist that I am, just needs things to go wrong? 

 

My garret is too full of food.  I can have the heat up as high as I need as we are switching companies and have to empty the propane tank.  Since we will lose that propane anyway, it’s almost like having free heat; even though I break out in a sweat when I remember just how much that tank cost to fill.

 

I have health insurance now too, and I went to the cardiologist the other day and he said my heart is good to go.  There was no permanent damage done and I am clear to get running and lifting weights. Now, that might be funny once I get going.  I have been on the treadmill all week, except I forgot yesterday.  That’s the trick now, to get in the habit.

 

Gaffer is scheduled to come home for Christmas, which is always a joy.  And, he is taking visiting bunny back home with him.  At least that is the plan, for now.  That’s what they thought last visit too.  Also, news from him is that he is buying an upscale wardrobe.  Last Christmas EMT bought Gaffer a really nice leather jacket.  I think it influenced him to upgrade from “Charlie Harper cargo pants” to jackets and even a tie.  Perhaps he is getting ready to go out in the world now.  We will know if he ever gets his hair styled. 

 

EMT may join the Army.  He took some type of test and got 100% on it.  They have been courting him ever since. They pick him up in Nashville and take him to Bloomington, to their office, where I think they conduct secret experiments on him.  From my understanding, no one gets 100%. 

 

And JRock starts his guitar lessons today.  He is doing MUCH better in his classes.  The teachers tell me that a lot of kids have trouble when they start high school but a year and a half is a bit much.

 

So, life is going well.  But, tomorrow is always another day. 

 

 

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There doesn’t seem to be much humor in jealousy or envy. I know, because I have spent the morning doing my daily Google research on “humor in jealousy.” I did find one humorous blog post, by a cartoonist, at Humor Columns by Syndicated Writer Jason Love: Jealousy.

Jealousy seems to be a common trait. We all feel it at times; whether we are envious, of the amount of ice cream in our friend’s cone or hearing the whistle of your brother’s new train on Christmas morning. Yup! That was me, I heard that whistle and I wanted that train.

I have had my share of jealousy. Most notably: upon having a girl call me and tell me she was dating my boyfriend and me breaking up with him, despite his assurance it wasn’t true. I remember, with all the angst a fifteen year old can bring to an issue, walking away from him, in the high school cafeteria, thinking it was the worse mistake of my life.  I was wrong.

I have made far worse mistakes since and had I known that, I might have turned around and apologized to him for not trusting him. However, due to my mother’s past, there was a lot of growing up believing that men were not to be trusted. She had due cause for her feelings but it took me a long time to get over her past.

I think being a victim of it has helped. For some reason, I think it may be that sneaky KARMA guy, I have been a victim of weird jealousy more times than I care to think about. I mean, who is jealous of an aunt-in-law because she helps care for a grandmother-in-law?

The only person you are hurting with jealousy is yourself. If you can’t trust someone, you shouldn’t be with them. Jealousy eats you up inside and so does envy. And, it’s a bit ridiculous to be envious or jealous of your mate’s family.  You may not like them, you may even hate them, but hey, your mate probably feels the same way and, unless there is some really preverted thing going on with them, why would you be jealous? If you are jealous, who the heck are they going to complain to about their weird family than you?

My daughter-of-eleven was jealous from the time she was young and thought I loved her step-brother more than I loved her, then she was jealous of her sister and then of my bond with her own son. He was all of two and I cared for him. It was all a sign of something more serious, but I did not know it then.

So, now, I face yet another situation of extended family jealousy and I have just decided that, could I, I would pack up and move to California or Hawaii or Alaska or Idaho or anywhere remote and preferably warm (that let’s out Alaska and Idaho) and let them all hash it out without me.  So, I’m staying out of it. If anyone is that little and insecure, then I feel sorry for them but life is too darn short to fret over it.

Hey, if you can’t fix it, move on.  Aloha

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